The MRI of DOOM

Go to the start of my story: So it begins

Don't think I'm a pessimist due to the title of this post. I stole it from the House recaps at Television Without Pity. Bad stuff ALWAYS happens on House when the Patient of the Week has an MRI.

I went to the second MRI of my life on May 19, 2008. I had the first one in 2002 when I was experiencing numbness and tingling in my right arm. That MRI showed no abnormalities. I still felt pretty crappy, but the vertigo had subsided somewhat and I was no longer nauseated.

I arrived at the hospital and did all of the registration stuff. Once I was lying on the table/slide before entering the MRI of DOOM, the tech asked what music I would like to hear. I wasn't aware that they now offered CDs. Being the music lover I am, I asked for some Aretha Franklin. Of course, they didn't have that. So I blanked out and just said the first thing that came to mind, "OK, got any Beatles?" They did! So I slid into the tube and assumed the most comfortable position for lying motionless. Then the most effed up versions of Beatles songs began to play. I assumed they put on some compilation CD that had unreleased studio recordings or some such. Dudes, I have never taken acid in my life, but after the experience of listening to that weird stuff while in the MRI of DOOM, I think I have vicariously. That was messed up!

When I expected the nice technician to say that I was done, she fooled me. She said, "We're going to bring you out and inject some contrast dye." Uh-oh. That doesn't sound good. I start freaking out a little inside my head; this was around the same time that Ted Kennedy was diagnosed with a brain tumor. OMG, OMG, OMG! Long story short, I got shot up with contrast dye and endured another round of pictures with the bizarre Beatles music in my ears.

When it was all over, I had to just sit for awhile before my head felt like I could walk again. You don't realize how dizzy you can get from lying flat and motionless for a long time. Anyway, I finally left and found GH (the Goat-Hub) and related the experience to him. We made jokes and went along our merry way, awaiting the results.

Next, The Dreaded Phone Call